When parents behave in a boistrous manner in front of their kids isnt it contributive to child abuse?
colin asked:
When parents behave in such a argumentive manner it may have a deep psychological effect on the kids and it could also be in a way considered a form of child abuse. Isn’t this a possibility
If we have to get into a heated argument wouldn’t it be better if done away from the kids like an enclosed room
Lyle
When parents behave in such a argumentive manner it may have a deep psychological effect on the kids and it could also be in a way considered a form of child abuse. Isn’t this a possibility
If we have to get into a heated argument wouldn’t it be better if done away from the kids like an enclosed room
Lyle
Tags: Child Abuse, Psychological Effect
April 29th, 2009 at 11:29 pm
Bethany
Everything does not come down to abuse!
Yes, I agree that arguing in front of your children can have an emotional effect on them, but there are so many children out there in really abusive homes (sexual, physical, emotional, no food, no love…..the list goes on) Why do we have to label everything abuse????
Edit****I totally agree that you should not fight or argue in front of them but I also want my children to learn that there is conflict in life. I am not with their father anymore, but if it got to the point that we didnt “fight fair”, then we would save it for another time.
My point is families disagree and sometimes it is taken too far, but by no means is it abuse!
April 30th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Bruce
Maybe, but probably not.
May 2nd, 2009 at 2:48 pm
Tyler
well everyone argues and has disagreements and I think it is healthy for children to see their parents have a disageement as long as it’s a civil argument and the kids see a conclusion where it works out.
Constant fighting and yelling or name calling between parents is harmful and I agree could be considered a form of child abuse if it is an ongoing thing. Often the kids see the fighting and then are not around for the making up once all is calm and so they are left with the bad feeling while the parents have moved on. Also children have a way of blaming themselves for their parents arguing.
My husband and I don’t really argue, we have discussions and disagreements but we handle them maturely and compromise whenever possible. We are usually on the same page with most issues.
EDIT: a thumb down? so someone thinks it’s ok for parents to name call and yell and scream at eachother in front of the kids? Sorry but that IS emotional abuse to the children and can leave emotional scars. I guess there are a lot of parents here who scream and yell in frontof their kids and think it’s ok. why else would I have thumbs down? I’ve said mature disagreements are healthy when children see the positive outcome. How can you people think yelling and screaming is ok? Get some control of yourself!
“it can’t always be avoided”? of course it can…it’s called self control! lol I am astonished how many people do not viewit as abusive to yell and name cal in front of children. This WILL cause long term emotional scars and that IS abusive.
May 3rd, 2009 at 7:19 pm
Patrick
yeah they say it is not good to fight in front of your kids but sometimes arguments happen but if you do fight infront of them make sure you make up infront of them
May 6th, 2009 at 2:14 am
Harrison
If they are screaming and name calling it is not good for the kids to see that however I don’t know if it would cause a deep psychological effect. People are just far too serious about every little thing these days.
May 8th, 2009 at 5:04 am
Craig
I think it can be somewhat emotionally abusive to scream, yell and rant in front of your children but to say that it creates a deep psychological effect may be slightly extreme. If it continues then yes it will have a deep harmful effect on them, but if the parents become aware of what they are doing and change the way they argue then I don’t think there will be a deep harmful effect on them.
Fighting in front of your kids will not harm them if you show them by example how to argue fairly and without losing your temper. It teaches them how to handle and voice disagreements without being verbally or emotionally extreme.
If my husband and I have an argument and it’s not going to stay a nice discussion/debate, we stop and discuss it later after our son has gone to bed and resume it then. If we feel as though one of us is getting out of hand or we start yelling, one of us stops and says we both need a break until we can talk about this without yelling and fighting unfairly.
So yes I suppose it is a form of emotional abuse, but it’s not the same as calling your child an idiot or belittling them by screaming at them in a corner.
May 8th, 2009 at 5:11 pm
Lee
I wouldn’t call it abuse at all.
If there’s yelling and name calling it’s absolutely not constructive, but it’s not abuse, either.
I think that as long as there is “fair fighting” going on and that the child sees a resolution, that it’s okay for them to see parents fighting. It can teach them how to handle volitale situations with others later on. And one day if you see your child fighting with his/her brother or sister you can point out the fight you had with your spouse as a reference, “See how mommy and daddy both compromised and then we weren’t unhappy with each other anymore? Why don’t you and Sally come up with a compromise of your own?”
However, there should never be any name calling or yelling involved. Take that somewhere else.
May 10th, 2009 at 4:09 pm
while its better to take it away from the horrified eyes of your children, it can’t always be avoided. i don’t think parents should feel guilty for being human. keep in mind also, every person is different. so many things will influence a child psychologically, either good or bad. it is important, as a parent, that we realize, we can not control everything in our child’s life. we just have to do our best and have faith that they’ll be ok.
May 11th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
Jade
No, it is not child abuse! Although I agree that arguments should be done away from the kids, this is not always possible. Real child abuse is when the kids are not being fed, are physically, verbally, emotionally, or sexually abused. You need to be really careful using the words “child abuse”.
May 13th, 2009 at 11:33 pm
gwyneth
My husband and I have been married for 20 years, and have 2 children, ages 18 and 14. We have argued (sometimes heatedly) in front of them, but we’ve also made up in front of them (well, not all parts of making up…LOL) I think it’s good for them, personally. They see us disagree, but they see us resolve our differences. Children need to learn how to resolve differences with others, and if they don’t see it in their parents marriage, then they grow up thinking that marriage is all rosy, and there is no disagreements in a “good” marriage, and that simply isn’t true.