dzelze asked:


My ex-boyfriend says that he fears for his safety around me. At no time have I ever physically harmed him or threatened to harm him.On several occasions I have feared for my safety around him. He now has an order of protection filed against me. I have to go to court over this.I feel threatened and intimidated by his mere presence.He has put through an emotional roller coaster for the last year. I have had past issues with my ex-husband that are so similar to what this guy has done to me.This guy has broke up with me on several occasions but still wanted to be intimate with me. He has told people that I am crazy, and the only reason he was with me was because I was “good in bed” as he put it. He has said this to my friends and relatives.I recently lost my daughter during a house fire and the way this guy is “playing” me has taken and emotional and mental toll on me.How do I stand up in court and try to defend myself against this guy.I have moved on and have a new boyfriend.

Brian

Francis Githinji asked:


There are many people who find themselves in an abusive relationship. Some of these people do not even realize that they are in an abusive relationship. An abusive relationship does not have to be a physical one. Someone does not have to hit you very hard or slap you before you realize that you are in an abusive relationship. As long as your partner makes you feel less of a person or constantly passes criticism to make you feel bad about yourself, you are in an abusive relationship. Research has it that it is more likely than not for a verbal abusive relationship to turn into a physical abusive relationship. You need to recognize you are in an abusive relationship and that you need to get out of it.

A person who constantly abuses you might not change unless they attend a lot of therapy that is targeted towards knowing what could be making the person to be abusive. The person must also accept that they have a problem and that they need help. Before that there is no telling if he or she will change. However, if your partner does not want to get help, it is time you said enough is enough and leave them. This is what you should do in your preparation to leaving an abusive relationship. Tell a friend you trust that you are in an abusive relationship and that you want to get out. Make sure you ask them not to make your intentions known to your partner. Let them help you make arrangements of leaving.

Save a lot of money in preparation to leaving an abusive relationship. This is because you might need a lot of money to relocate in another place. Do not move any where near his or her home. Move as far away from them as possible. Make sure they do not know where you are moving to, if possible let as few friends as you can know of your where about. The money you saved will help you settle as you look for another job. Do not want to go back to your previous job, he or she is sure to find you there and there is no telling what they can do. If you had any children, make sure you do not forget any of their legal documents. Carry them with you as you make your exit.

Make sure you get a restraining order. This will ensure that the person does not go anywhere near you or your children. Until he or she finds help, do not meet up with him or her to discuss anything. Let them pass through your lawyer for any kind of settlement that they would like to make with you. Lastly, make sure you have contacts of a local domestic violence center so that incase your partner comes to your place you can call them. No one deserves to be in an abusive relationship. Do not stay there because you cannot find the strength to move out. Make a choice, it could be your life or your life.