Parental Verbal Abuse?
kirei.keiko asked:
My parents always call me names, saying I’m a stupid whore, or saying my friends are shit, and anything I like is crap. Everything I do is wrong. I’m not allowed to make mistakes in my house. I’m always trying to please my parents but nothing ever works. They’ve never threatened my physically, but I know they don’t love me. Ever since second grade, I’ve been writing in my diary about my hatred towards my parents. They don’t listen to me. My problems are always just because it’s my fault to them. Yet I still try to please them. I told myself to move out on my 18th birthday, but I still have 3 years, and I can’t stand it any longer. What should I do?
thanks for all the help but there’s just one thing… in my culture, ‘talking’ to parents is just weird. there’s no such sentence as ‘i love you’ or ‘i need to talk to you’ it’ll be another excuse for them to say i’m stupid.
Greg
My parents always call me names, saying I’m a stupid whore, or saying my friends are shit, and anything I like is crap. Everything I do is wrong. I’m not allowed to make mistakes in my house. I’m always trying to please my parents but nothing ever works. They’ve never threatened my physically, but I know they don’t love me. Ever since second grade, I’ve been writing in my diary about my hatred towards my parents. They don’t listen to me. My problems are always just because it’s my fault to them. Yet I still try to please them. I told myself to move out on my 18th birthday, but I still have 3 years, and I can’t stand it any longer. What should I do?
thanks for all the help but there’s just one thing… in my culture, ‘talking’ to parents is just weird. there’s no such sentence as ‘i love you’ or ‘i need to talk to you’ it’ll be another excuse for them to say i’m stupid.
Greg
June 14th, 2009 at 8:49 pm
Jade
A parent should never call their child names! They are wrong-is there a grandmother you can go live with? You should report their abuse to a counselor at school or someone you trust! 18 needs to come fast!
June 15th, 2009 at 11:30 pm
Kerri
are youre parents happy.have they got financial problems.sometimes parents take all their tension out on their kids rather than thier partners cause they no there wont be a massive argument.they will always win if they shout at you.are they on drugs.this could be the reason they could shout at you when they are on comedown.if you have anyone in youre family who you trust tell them whats been going on all this time.you know sometimes a problem shared is a problem halved .another adult knowing how they treat youhas to make them wake up and smell the coffee.
June 18th, 2009 at 1:35 am
Jade
I was in that boat and moved out when I was 16, being homeless was better then living under their roof.
I have a great career (6 figure salary) a better house then my parents, I am a MUCH better parent myself. But my parents never stopped berating me even as a successful adult, more successful then them.
I eventually just disowned them for my own mental health.
But I will say one thing if you can just block them out it really would be better to just put up with it. I had to work REALLY hard to achive what I have now, much harder then if I would have just mooched off my parents for a bit longer.
A few more years under those bastards thumbs can make the next 15 years so much more doable.
June 20th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Lyle
Try to move in with a realtive or friends family. They should never ever call you names like that my cousins parents did that to her becasue she became pregnant as a teenager so i let her come live with me and i am only 17 but i support myself and her. You could do the same thing find family or a friend you can stay with if all else fails call social services on them.
June 22nd, 2009 at 7:00 am
you need to talk to someone like a councillor your parents don’t have the right to call you names.
June 23rd, 2009 at 8:53 pm
Patrick
That is definitely abuse. Verbally, that is. You need to tell a grandparent or some other adult. Girl, you can’t live like that! Even if it does mean orphan, it’s worth it. That is, if your really uncomfortable. I mean, if they have random time periods where they are nice, take one of those times and talk to them. Say:
“I love you guys alot, and I really need you to love me too. I’m going to be moving out in three years, and why not make them the best.(if only child- I’m your only child, and will be your only child. Please, I’m asking, that you show me love and respect.)I love you guys.”
Or if your going to another adult to adress the problem:
“Since second grade, I’ve had something personal going on in my life, and it really needs to be discussed. Do you mind me telling you?”
(they say yes.)
“Well, my parents have been verbally abusing me. It really needs to stop. I have been living a life I can’t handle. Do you know what to do? Please, I really need help. Thanxs.”
Hope this helps!
June 26th, 2009 at 12:14 pm
Colin
That is very sad. I wish these next 3 years to go by super fast for you. If you can no longer take their abuse, go to a shelter, and stay there. Anything is better than living with that.